My writing today is accompanied by the sounds of gunfire and torpedo explosions, as despite it being only nine days till Christmas my beloved still insists on watching normal films and Vikings for the umpteenth time – this evening’s choice being U-571, featuring Matthew McConaughey (yay!) and a submarine (meh). I know he has seen this before, as I have seen it before and this is not a film I would ever have watched by choice, despite the presence of the delicious Mr McC. He claimed when I pointed this out that he has definitely never seen it before and that I must be thinking of another film. He has form in this area: I call it his Father Dougal brain, after an episode of Father Ted where Ted is attempting to remind Dougal of a day in the local town where they witnessed a car chase, a bank robbery and other such exciting things. Dougal has no memory of the day until Ted says, ‘You were wearing your red jumper!’
With 22 minutes to go, 90 minutes into the film, my Beloved has just said, “is this the one where they drop a torpedo on someone’s legs?” as recollection dawns. Yes dear, you were wearing your red jumper.
While he claims not to recall the many films he has watched, and therefore can watch them again a seemingly infinite number of times, he has decided he has seen The Muppets’ Christmas Carol too many times. Ditto Elf, Scrooged and other such classic Yuletide films, although not Home Alone, which gets right on my nerves and I suspect they actually left Kevin behind on purpose as he’s so bloody annoying.
The number of times you have watched them is not the point of Christmas movies, I feel: they are part of the festive tradition, the background to the season, and make you feel all Christmassy and warm and fuzzy: a classic being It’s a Wonderful Life. Bankruptcy? Throwing yourself into a freezing torrent? Being terminally frustrated by the unfairness of your life? No one understanding you? Evil big business type person? Truly, it has it all.
And Miracle on 34th Street? Sectioning Kris Kringle? Rampant commercialism? Sceptical small child? Bitter divorcee mother? Court case threatening the very existence of Christmas? Again, it has it all. The 1947 version is obviously the best, but the Dickie Attenborough version will do in a pinch.
Better people than I have probably written reams on the morals behind these stories, using words like redemption, faith and suchlike, but for me they’re an integral part of the time of year. In a similar vein is Lost Christmas, which was a BBC production in 2011 based on David Logan’s book. Starring Suzy Eddie Izzard, this was a gorgeous magical fairy tale that’s hardly ever repeated and isn’t available through the usual streaming services or on DVD. The audiobook is next up on my list, once Terry Pratchett’s Hogfather is wrapped up.
Similarly, Christmas music is part of December*: I love Noddy shouting ‘It’s CHRISTMAAAASSSS’ and Jona Lewie stopping the cavalry, Steeleye Span burbling along in Latin and Mike Oldfield’s In Dulce Jubilo can make me feel Christmassy in July. The Darkness and their glam bells, Annie Lennox and Al Green putting a little love into our hearts, The Dropkick Murphys ode to family get-togethers, Bruce checking that the E-Street Band are on the nice list, Darlene Love begging her baby to come home for Christmas, Greg Lake’s miserable classic, Chris de Burgh getting all spacey, Elton stepping into Christmas, Joni wishing for a river to skate away on, Earth Kitt imploring Santa for diamonds, and Bing and David getting all twee. I love them all**. A friend sent me some digital equivalents of Christmas mixtapes a few years ago and they’re now required listening after December 1st, and I can even tolerate East 17 and Coldplay once or twice.
*not John Lennon or Paul McCartney’s offerings though. Or Cliff Richard. Drivel.
**Justin Bieber and Mariah Carey are deleted on sight. Dreadful.
Other things making me happy this week
- A morning at an Islington primary school with Grace Holliday, one of our illustrator-educators, with a ‘Meet the Illustrator’ session rearranged from National Illustration week.
- Crochet toadstools from a pattern by Haekelkeks
- Catching up to October on the temperature supernova
- An early morning walk
- Pretty sparkly nails and a morning out with hot chocolate and catching up
- Being proud of No 1 Timeshare Teenager speaking out about the stigma of food banks
What this all translates to is that I’ve passed from resignation to acceptance and into anticipation… I should probably do some shopping, and remember to get the turkey out to defrost on Thursday. The cake and I have finished the rum, so the marzipan can go on mid week ready for icing. It’s nearly CHRISSSSTMMMAAAASSSSS!
Kirsty x
What I’ve been reading
Jeeves and the Yuletide Spirit – P.G.Wodehouse
Misplaced Magic – Jessica Dodge
Mrs Pooter’s Diary/Sharon, Tracy and the Rest – Keith Waterhouse
A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens (Audible)
Hogfather – Terry Pratchett (Audible)
The London Seance Society – Sarah Penner
Witch Hunt – Syd Moore
What Kirsty did next 