Tag: exercise

264: funny peculiar or funny haha?

On Monday my friend Jill convinced me to go with her to a new exercise class, called Strength and Supple, or possibly Supple and Strength, I don’t know. It didn’t include glowsticks or loud music, anyway. It did involve hand weights, yoga mats and blocks and – somewhat unexpectedly – small beach balls which we were supposed to tuck behind our knees and use to commit some awkward stretches.

Those who know me well are aware that agility and I are, at best, very distant acquaintances. Graceful poses and I are not friends at all. Expecting me to get from downward dog back up to standing is, I feel, something that should only be undertaken behind closed doors and possibly in a darkened room. I can get half way and then I get sort of stuck, much like Winnie the Pooh attempting to make an exit from Rabbit’s house after a whole pot of honey. It’s best just to hang a tea towel on me and leave me to get out of it in my own time. Really.

After the downward dog bit there were some warrior poses and some leaping about in the name of cardio, the aforementioned beach ball bits, and then Jill had promised me a nice relaxing bit at the end. But first, FIRST, there were some contortions that involved holding the beach ball between our knees while lifting a yoga block over our heads and attempting to sort of not do a sit up. At least, that was what I think we were supposed to be doing. I could be mistaken.

Sounds simple, yes? Lying down is well within my wheelhouse, I thought, as at least I can’t fall over and I can deal with getting up again afterwards. This turned out not to be the case as my head decided that this was an opportune moment for one of its occasional bouts of vertigo and it was touch and go whether I’d throw up or not. I gave up, sat up and added ‘lying down’ to the list of things getting that little bit more challenging as I get older.

Talking of funny turns, this week I have been listening to Marcel Lucont, who first dropped onto my radar with the excellent poem ‘Wine in a Can’ which you can see below. He’s very dry, very funny, probably not actually French, and has a podcast with the best bits of his interactive live show ‘The Whine List’ which caused Thing 3 to ask what on earth I was listening to. He’s deliciously judgy without punching down, and worth a listen though not in front of young children.

Other things making me happy this week

  • A surprise in the post from TT2 – a cute picture of my Beloved, Thing 2 and GTs 2 and 3 taken a few months ago.
  • Sunshine all week! The cherry blossom is out and London is looking shiny
  • My Threads feed being completely full of penguins after the orange basketcase’s announcement of trade tariffs on the unpopulated Heard and McDonald Islands – no people, anyway, but thousands of penguins exporting who knows what.

This week the kids are off school so I don’t have to wrangle any of them out of bed, so that’s something to look forward to! Today we’re going for a swim and Jill’s mum – queen of the knitted bobble hat – will be coming to meet her subjects.

Same time next week,

Kirsty x

What I’ve been reading:

Red Bones/Dead Water/Silent Voices/Thin Air – Ann Cleeves

Raising Steam/Moving Pictures – Terry Pratchett (Audible)

222 and a half: a bonus post

Anatomy of a run

Monday morning seemed like a good moment to start running again, as I quite enjoyed it and I’d like to do it again. I started Couch to 5k again in lockdown, but while my knees were fine my Achilles tendon decided it didn’t like it. Four years later, it feels like time to try again – I love walking but for a quick morning boost running is the way to go. Sounds pretty straightforward, yes? You’d think….

So, running kit on and feeling if not motivated, at least vertical, I…

  • tape kneecaps firmly into place
  • found my daps, which on inspection were looking like they needed replacing
  • located new daps in cupboard. Checked to see if the laces would glow in the dark because, you know, they looked like they might.
  • put on daps and laced up with my sister’s voice in my head…. they aren’t done up enough! Use the lock things! Thanks Tan
  • located running earphones
  • found phone. Battery on 16%. Same, phone. Same.
  • add watch and inform Strava that I intend to go for a run
  • Find favourite running playlist
  • opened C25k app. Phone informs me that the app is so old it might not work on my phone. Ignore warning and continue. Phone says app requires money for new license. Delete app.
  • Find official NHS Couch to 5k app on principle that this is healthy. Choose a coach, it says. Select Steve Cram on the principle that he probably knows what he’s doing.
  • Start walking accompanied by the northern tones of Mr Cram
  • Three minutes later. Steve Cram STILL talking. Then says we’re about to start. I have already started.
  • Steve Cram still talking while we are doing walking.
  • Yep, still talking. Beginning to regret choice of coach.
  • Open app and discover that while I can change coaches, there is no option to do this thing without a coach.
  • Delete app. Delete Steve Cram.
  • Remember that I liked running because it’s half an hour when no one talks to me, and that’s why I do it solo. Sorry Jill. Sorry Steve Cram.
  • Find new app, which has annoying electronic American woman (for some reason I picture her as Korean. Go figure) but at least she doesn’t try to motivate me other than to tell me when to start and stop running. It is the app that goes ping.
  • Remember I haven’t started Strava. We all know if we didn’t Strava it, it didn’t happen. Start Strava.
  • Do run accompanied by pings, bongs, electronic American, and excellent choice of music. Knees and ankle still attached. That wasn’t so bad.

Next run is Wednesday. Note to self….charge phone!