Honestly, gang, the second half of 2026 needs to pull its socks up and do a damn sight better than the first, as none of the stuff in the past six months was on my life bingo card back in January. However, things will hopefully start looking up even if I still can’t….
Last Sunday’s operation was a success, the lovely consultant and her assistant informed me, and my eye is looking better already. I have to take their word for it as almost a week later I’m still viewing the world through a haze of swelling, bruising and ointment. It’s starting to feel less painful though I’m continuing to wear large sunglasses in public and my eyebrow is oddly quirked in a way I could never manage on purpose. Crossing roads is dangerous as I have no peripheral vision on my right side and turning my head too far causes double vision. Going anywhere – even over the road to Miriam’s or on Friday making my way to Rhiannon’s to house-sit (all of 40 minutes) is exhausting.
I was also reassured (but not remotely surprised as I know what causes this sort of thing) to be told my pregnancy test (mandatory) was negative. I think I was reassured when everyone kept asking me what operation I was in for and then drew an arrow pointing to my right eye. I tried saying ‘leg amputation’ once just to see what the reaction was….she did at least double check my notes…
The team at the hospital were lovely and looked after me really well apart from all the shining of lights in my eyes and poking me with the odd needle which was apparently necessary. There were no beds available in the hospital (again) so I got to spend all my time in recovery rather than on a ward. It was…interesting. The lovely team kept me full of tea and biscuits, and I even got to choose my lunch from the restaurant (venison stew or burgers!), but it also meant no visitors.
This rule did not seem to apply to the family of the young man who had flipped his car on the M11 roundabout on Sunday morning, who finally appeared from surgery at about 9pm. At that point about a dozen poeple arrived all claiming to be his immediate family, ignoring the nurses when they tried to say that only his parents were allowed in, and letting each other in and out in groups of three and four. I was impressed by his auntie’s fervent and extensive prayers, less so by his girlfriend’s noisy shoes, the ones who were on their way to Stansted and dropped in as it was on the way, and by the raucous party they appeared to be holding in the waiting room until 11pm. Eventually – having been told once too often by the family that the nurses ‘got no right to stop us going in, we’re family’ – the nurses phoned security at which the ‘family’ were all outraged innocence and ‘but whyyyy, we ain’t done nothing wrong’. Eventually they moved the poor lad to a ward. I dread to think what would have happened if noisy shoe girlfriend had heard about the other ‘girlfriend’ who’d been in the car with him when he flipped it.
The other drama was the poor chap who’d had his appendix removed and on waking up and being asked if he knew where he was replied ‘Of course I do! I’m in a SHAM ward in a SHAM hospital and YOU’RE TRYING TO STEAL MY ORGANS’. The poor nurse explained that no, he’d had his appendix out and was in recovery, he’d just woken up from his anaesthetic. A few moments later as they gave him something or other…’NOW YOU’RE GIVING ME ILLEGAL DRUGS! PHONE THE POLICE!’ in tones of absolute outrage. Honestly, it quite took the edge off my fentanyl buzz.
Still, the lovely team were great – so patient taking care of a whole lot of people, protecting their few beds from marauding ED managers and tolerating all sorts of weird reactions from anaesthetics. I’m glad I took my earplugs though…
Hopefully later this week I’ll be feeling up to going into the office even if I keep my giant sunnies on….
Things making me happy this week
- Lovely friends looking after me
- Dinner with London sister and brother in law and two of the Things
- Hackney Gelato Banana Caramel & Pecan ice cream
- Spoiling myself with a pedicure (thanks to family for the guilt free birthday treat!)
- Long phone conversations – going old school but with unlimited minutes
And that’s it from me for the week – hopefully next week I’ll be less lopsided and able to do more things.
What I’ve been reading
Jump/Mount/Tackle – Jilly Cooper. All of these are supposed to have exclamation marks in the titles but I! Just! Can’t! (A Jilly question – why do all working class characters have broad cockney accents even the darkest depths of badly-concealed Gloucestershire?)
The Antiquarian’s Object of Desire – India Hilton
Fathomfolk – Eliza Chan
What Kirsty did next 